CHAPTER ONE : A life lived — 1998
I stood by the fire, a heart, in the middle of a break down, without her, I felt like a love song without a love, a sad song playing on a loop.
Nobody could love me like she could.
I felt the tears building up, my soul was dead, I was alone, sitting in a living room, weeping, listening to a song, about her, I found myself in the corner of a room, everything was reminding me of her, that sweet perfume.
I felt the storm, in my heart, building up, drowning me, in that sea of misery.
That night, she told me she loved me, I felt myself flying, the words building up, holding her, wanting her, she felt the same.
This was the dream, that perfect life, that romance novels are written about.
The end, was a cutter’s dream, I would cut myself, to see if I still bled, to see if this was reality, or some sort of nightmare, the end of all ends.
I hope, I pray, I stood in the rain, wishing I would die that day.
I hope, I pray, I stood in the rain, wishing I would die that day.
There I was, a newly minted widower, a man standing by the grave, not knowing what to do, but there I was, trying to keep myself from breaking down, to this day, I fail.
The end, was a cutter’s dream, I would cut myself, to see if I still bled, to see if this was reality, or some sort of nightmare, the end of all ends.
I stood there, on the street, crying real tears.
This must be reality, a night mare in technicolor.
Where was the reset button?
She died that night, I was there, trying to pound her chest, she was gone but I wouldn’t give up.
1998, a good memory, we were married, a nice, beloved ceremony, I wish I could go back to that day.
2012,a bad day, I hope, I pray, I stood in the rain, wishing I would die that day.
There I was, a newly minted widower, a man standing by the grave, not knowing what to do, but there I was, trying to keep myself from breaking down, to this day, I fail.
This is my story.
I write it with tears in my eyes, a song in my heart, and a kiss on my lips.
WANDERING WHERE I AM GOING! 